Here are “Ba-dum-ch” Jokes-submitted for publication on Rob’s Megaphone. The submitter’s blog is listed first. Please visit the contributors’ blogs. I’m betting you’ll thank me later. :0)
The Rest of Me Three nuns walked into a bar … the fourth one ducked.
ThriftShopRomantic A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, “Why the long face?”
Praning’s Thoughts (Pick up lines) Do u belive in love at first sight?? Or should I walk past again?
Tommy Buettner Blogging Baseball I don’t drink anymore…I don’t drink any less either.
The key to a good marriage is to go out to dinner 2 nights a week.
She goes on Tuesdays I go on Thursdays.
Information . . . . Power and Confusion Getting married is very much like going to the restaurant with friends. You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.
A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, “What would you like, sir?”
He looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, “A quickie.”
The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, “What would you like, sir?” Again the man thoroughly checks her out and again answers, “A quickie, please.”
This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding “SMACK!” and storms away.
A man sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, “Um, Pal, I think it’s pronounced ‘quiche’.”
The Aspiring Horseplayer From “the king of one-liners” in Goodfellas: “The wife says to me she wants to go on vacation to some place she’s never been before…I says hey, try the kitchen!”
Homemaker’s Haven What do you call a man with a spade? Doug
What do you call a man without a spade? Douglas
What do you call a man with a crew-cut? Shaun
What do you call a man under a car? Jack
What do you call a man that’s suspicious? Sly
What do you call a man in debt? Bill
What do you call an electrician? Serg
What do you call a man lying on the floor? Matt
What do you call a man floating in the water? Bob
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idea!
What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no idea!
Homemaker’s Haven What do you call a bleeding deer with no eyes and no legs? Still no bloody idea!
Grab Some Health News A piece of broccoli walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says “We don’t serve food here”.